Recovering from parental divorce (understanding childhood feelings)

Paul is still affected by his parents divorce when he was 8.  He asked for help.

When I meditated for Paul I was taken to a place filled with depressed souls.  Their stories would not have helped anyone.  However they were surrounded by angels walking amongst them, comforting and teaching them.  One of these angels steps up.  He is asking me to write for Paul.

“Paul was a very sensitive child.  He loved his mother and his father. He needed them both and depended on both of them for his sense of self.  He was very young when his parents separated.  He very much missed the daily cheerful presence of his father.  It was as if a light had been taken away from him.  The bright energy of his father was no longer continuously available for him to draw upon.  He was not completely deprived of his father, in fact he had regular contact, but his young soul needed and wanted that frequent and constant reassurance that everything would be all right and that he himself was OK.

Paul’s mother struggled to keep her small family going and she herself was depressed.  This made time spent without his father uninspiring and unrewarding.  He could only think about the next time he would be seeing his dad.  He found it hard to focus on the present moment.  This situation led to a habit of behaviour and a pattern of thinking that has stayed with Paul, even though he is now an adult.  He tends not to live in the moment, he is not enjoying his life for what it is.  He keeps looking ahead trying to anticipate ‘great days’ in the future, or he looks back and remembers the feelings of emptiness when he was not with his father.

Paul needs to learn to focus on what he is doing today now.  Is he communicating with the people around him?  Is he appreciating them?  Is he even noticing them?  He needs to notice the beauty of the world around him every day, maybe in a flower, the colour of the sky, a childs laughter.

As he gradually learns to appreciate each day, living fully in the NOW, bringing himself into the present, when he finds himself drifting back into the past, or off into the future, he will start to feel more fulfilled.

Paul also needs to start to notice how other people are thinking and feeling, and to notice what motivates his nearest and dearest.  More personal interaction is needed, less introspection is required.

That was what came to me, and it reminded me of a quote I have heard which goes something like

The past is history, the future is a mystery, we can only live in the present, and that’s what it is, a gift from the Universe, enjoy it!

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